Stowaway #2 Edward Neale Durlak
INTO THE LIGHT
By Ed Durlak, 07/21/17
1
Coming out of the darkness, the light hit his face like a hard slap. It sort of sounded like one too as he winced to see, temporarily blinded as his eyes tried painfully to make the adjustment.
“Do you know why you’re here?” the invisible woman behind the fiery glow asked. Her voice was calm and serene, but eerily so and not soothing in the least.
“I guess so,” he replied. He had no idea, but that’s what came to mind. For a brief moment he wrestled in futility with the restraints that bound his arms & legs to whatever contraption she had strapped him into. Then, he chuckled and followed that with a deep breath of resignation.
“You know you can’t break free,” she said. “Have you accepted that?” Again, her voice was devoid of emotion and it was unsettling.
“Not yet,” he said defiantly. “Forgive me my eternal optimism.” But then, he let the tension ease out of his body and relaxed. “Getting there though,” he added, “fairly quickly, too.”
“Good,” she asserted. “I would hate to see you hurt yourself trying.”
“I suppose that would take the fun out it,” he pondered aloud.
“No,” she said. “Your strength works against you here, you shouldn’t bother.”
He took a moment to let her words hang in the air and tried to clarify his vision. It was of no use, however, all he could see was a cone of light shrouded by total darkness. “So you think I’m strong,” he said. “Are you flirting with me?” He asked, promptly laughing at his own absurdity.
“Would you like that?” She responded flatly.
“Couldn’t hurt,” he said. “In fact, that would put the fun back into it.”
“You use humor to deflect from the reality of the situation,” she said. “You think you’re funny.”
“Guilty,” he admitted. “But, trust me, I am funny. Next to you, I’m freaking hilarious.”
Just then, the wretched monster lurched out of the darkness and into the light, facing him squarely in plain view and shouted in furious anger, “Damn You! No More Jokes!”
He tried to recoil away, forgetting he was ensnared for a moment, and then shut his eyes in terror as the beast unleashed a heinous and triumphant scream. His last thought was of a wolf just before the kill. Paralyzed with fear, darkness took him quickly.
2
“You said it was a dream,” Nate said, confused.
“It was a dream,” Marty answered.
“That’s not a dream dude, it’s a fucking nightmare,” Nate said, finishing his point.
Marty shrugged, and then took a healthy swig of wheat beer from the mug he’d never let out of his hand during the recap he’d just provided. He swallowed and let out a sheepish grin as he saw Nate mock him with a shrug of his own. “So, what do you think it means?” Marty asked.
“What do I think it means?” Nate asked, stupefied. “That the bitch is going to kill you, duh!”
Marty laughed out loud.
“I’m not kidding, Marty!” Nate continued. “You have to listen to your gut on this one.”
“Technically asshole, that’s my sub-conscious, not my gut” Marty corrected.
“Whatever the fuck,” Nate pressed on undeterred, bolstered in fact and a tad annoyed. “Get a clue, will you please, before it’s too late. You’re the only one who sees anything there, the rest of us figured her out a long time ago.”
“There’s a lot there,” Marty objected. “She just needs to be in the light.”
“Oh no,” Nate groaned, shaking his head. “Not this again.”
A dreamy, almost hypnotic stare washed over Marty’s face as he let go of the beer and extended both of his hands across the table. “Give me your hands, Nate,” he insisted.
“Fuck No,” Nate replied and quickly folded his arms in protest.
“Nate?” Marty persisted, narrowing his gaze. Nate softened a bit, but didn’t budge. Marty hesitated, but then relented and returned to clutching his beer.
“Fine,” Marty said. “Be that way.” Marty took another drink and smiled. “But, I’m going to go ahead and say this anyway.”
“Please don’t,” Nate begged, already knowing what he was going to hear, or some version of it.
“There are those that walk in the darkness and those that walk in the light,” Marty said. “Most of us are in between.” Marty’s voice swelled with certainty as he continued. “Let someone from the darkside take your light, that’s sad & tragic of course.” Marty paused. “But, to bring someone from the darkside into the light, that’s just…” Marty trailed off as if searching for the right word, but that was just for effect because he had it already. “Beautiful!”
Nate scowled back, letting silence fall between them. Then, said abruptly, “Fuck You!”
3
Veronica was shocked. “Nate wouldn’t take your hands?” She asked, incredulous.
“I know, right?!” Marty agreed. “Can you believe it?”
“He does know, right?” She pressed, having always wanted to ask the question. Marty thought for a moment and then nodded. But, then his expression changed to one of uncertainty.
“I mean, I think he knows,” Marty explained. “To be fair, we are drunk most of the time when I’ve tried it on him before.”
“Then, maybe he doesn’t know,” Veronica surmised. “You can’t blame him for that.”
“Fair enough,” Mary agreed. “But, he won’t even listen to me about you know who.”
“What about her?” Veronica groaned. “That she’s not worth the trouble? Yeah, he’s right about that.”
“How can you say that?” Marty chided. “You two were such good friends back in the day!”
Marty could tell by Veronica’s expression that she was not impressed by his remark.
“Sorry,” Marty said, attempting to recover. “I was just kidding.”
“Damn You! No More Jokes!” Veronica blurted out. Then, suddenly regretted it when she saw Marty’s demeanor quickly change, he almost looked frightened. “What?” She asked, concerned.
“What you said,” Marty explained cautiously. “I just heard that in a dream.”
“Yeah, ok, that’s weird,” Veronica said dismissively.
“No,” Marty countered. “Like, word for word, that’s what she said.”
“Who said?” Veronica inquired. “So and So?”
“No,” Marty responded quickly, but then stopped to ponder the question. “At least, I don’t think it was her. It was a woman’s voice, but it was different. It was detached, emotionless.”
“Sounds like her to me!” Veronica said proudly, quickly eliciting a frown from Marty.
“It wasn’t her,” Marty said, trying to sound sure. “This thing in the dream, it was a monster.”
“Still not seeing a difference here,” Veronica said, continuing the onslaught. “Just saying.”
“Very funny,” Marty said. “Damn you, no more jokes,” he said, meaning it to sound humorous given the conversation, but it just fell flat as he was distracted by a sudden uneasiness.
“Well, whatever,” Veronica said. “I’ll pray for you!”
4
“I think I might be damned,” Marty said, settling uncomfortably into the chair. For a quick moment, he hesitated to rest his arms, wondering if restraints would magically appear and ensnare him.
“Why do you say that?” His therapist asked.
“Bad dreams,” he answered bluntly. “And now, they’re creeping into my real life.”
“That’s not so unusual,” the woman said calmly, carefully setting her notebook down on the small table between them. “The subconscious is a mirror of sorts. It reflects the things you’re thinking about, which are part of your reality. It shouldn’t surprise you at all that your dreams and your waking life overlap at times.”
Marty frowned, processing the explanation.
“I guess so,” he said. “But, I wouldn’t expect them to be so precise,” he countered.
“What do you mean by that? She asked.
“It’s just, I mean,” he stammered, trying to formulate an answer that made any sense. “If one thing from a dream actually happens in real life, maybe the whole dream is going to?”
“Perhaps,” she conceded. “But, I wouldn’t lose any sleep over it.”
She said it so flatly, Marty had to ask. “Was that a joke?”
Without offering a smile as confirmation, she replied. “Yes, it was.”
“Nice!” Marty said, impressed. “You might want to punch up your delivery though.”
“I’m not the funny one, Marty,” she said. “That’s you.”
“Is that your professional opinion?” Marty chided, cracking a smile.
“Just an observation,” she stated. “You use humor to deflect from the reality of the situation.”
His smile quickly faded. “What did you say?” He asked, lifting his arms again, just in case.
“You think you’re funny,” she added.
“Wow,” Marty blurted out, shaken. “I really wish you hadn’t said that.” To make matters worse, just then he recognized the similarity. “The way you talk,” he said. “You sound just like her.”
“Just like who?” She inquired.
“Both of them,” he explained, knowing that would only make sense to him. Expecting to be met with a curious look, instead she remained emotionless. “So, anyway,” he said, nervously rising up from the chair. “I’m afraid I have to go.”
5
Marty hit the streets, walking at a faster pace than usual. It was getting dark and that wasn’t helping his anxiety. He plodded along aimlessly, trying to plot his next move. Maybe he should call Veronica and see if she wanted to go to the bar. Or, he could hit up Nate for an impromptu jam session. Or, perhaps he should just finally break down and reach out to her.
It had been months, but he knew that he had the power to smooth things over. After all, it wasn’t like it ended horribly. It just ended stupidly. He knew the rules of her game. Whatever happened, it was always his fault. Whatever he did, it was never enough. However hard he tried, he was always a disappointment. And, his jokes just weren’t that funny.
Yes, she said and did a lot of mean things, but she couldn’t help it. Yes, people hated her, but they didn’t know her the way he did. He had a way of breaking down her walls where no one else could. All it required was unconditional love and a high tolerance for abuse and palpable disinterest. But, he was stubborn. He was too positive a person to just give up on her. He had invested too much for far too long. Despite how horribly she treated him, he knew he was the one who could make her see the light.
The street lights started flickering on. Though blinding, he couldn’t help but glance up into them as each one caught his attention. It was punishing, but he persisted, undeterred. Then suddenly, he stopped and looked around. It was strangely quiet. He seemed to be alone on the street, but it was too early for that. And, he wasn’t exactly sure what street he was even on. He neared the corner and tried to make out the sign, but the light in front of it glowed brighter and he couldn’t see.
He turned away, hoping for a better view behind him. And, there she was. Or was she? He squinted to get a better look, but she was only in silhouette, bathed in light that continued to grow more brilliant. He walked toward her, proceeding with caution. With one hand, he shaded his eyes and cautiously reached out with the other. Just as he was about to touch her, something made him stop. He heard the voice from the dream once more, not sure if it was from the shape in front of him or beyond.
“Why haven’t you given up?” She asked. “You can’t break free.”
He held perfectly still, as if somehow that would save him from this, whatever it was. Expecting the worst, he thought he’d take a moment and choose his last words carefully.
“I don’t give up,” he answered defiantly. “Giving up… First, it’s a thing that you do, then it becomes who you are.”
“There’s a difference between giving up and knowing when you’ve had enough,” she retorted. “You can’t save everybody. Maybe you should just save yourself.”
Afraid to say anything more, he remained silent. Quickly considering his options, he felt he had only one. He made his hands into fists, then relaxed them. He brought them in front of his face and turned them, gazing upon them like the secret weapons he and Veronica knew they were. Then, he lunged for her. But, suddenly she was gone, taking the exaggerated light with her in an instant.
6
His eyes easily adjusted to the new surroundings. The street seemed familiar again and was full of life and people. He took a moment to steady himself and try to make sense of what just happened. Before he could do that, there was a text alert on his phone. He didn’t have to look, he knew it was her.
Hi!
He stared at the screen, pondering the inevitability of fate, amongst other things. He reluctantly started to type, then pressed send knowing it was a mistake.
Marty, what are you doing? He asked himself.
Hey Gorgeous! Been a while! Still breaking hearts left & right?
Oh, puke.
LOL! You’re too funny!
At least somebody thinks so
At least somebody thinks so.
Huh?
Never mind
Too hard to explain and you wouldn’t care anyway.
I need something from you
Of course you do, why else would you be reaching out?
Sure! How can I help?
I have a little problem
You have a bunch of problems.
Oh no! What’s up?
Too much to type, come see me!
See me?! I wonder if she’s wearing that blue sweater, the tight one where you can see her…
Hurry! It’s going to be daylight soon.
That matters why?
Ok! On my way!
7
“Angelica?” Marty called out, stepping into the dark room where she was waiting. “It’s Marty.”
“Do you know why you’re here?” Angelica asked, emotionless. Marty was instantly struck by how much personality was lost in translation from text to in person. Also, the question was familiar.
“I guess so,” he replied. The response was familiar as well. “Because I’m an eternal optimist?” Marty peered around. “Hey, could you come into the light a little more? I can barely see you.” When she didn’t move closer, he added, “And you’re too pretty not to look at.”
“Are you flirting with me?” she asked flatly. “You know, you were never any good at that, right?”
“Thanks for always stabbing me with those truth daggers of yours,” Marty quipped. “You sure know how to make a guy feel special.” He knew what was coming next and there was no use fighting it.
“You use humor to deflect from the reality of the situation,” she said. “You think you’re funny.”
“Guilty,” he admitted. “But, trust me, I am funny. Next to you, I’m freaking hilarious.”
Angelica lurched out from the corner of the room and shouted, “Damn You! No More Jokes!”
Marty held firm, somehow bolstered by his familiarity with the situation. “This isn’t real.”
Angelica laughed, unpleasantly. She slowly moved in, circling like a predator, and faced him. The light in the room intensified, obscuring Marty’s ability to see her clearly. Her shape was changing.
“It’s real, Marty,” she cackled. “And, you are special. In fact, you have something I need badly.”
So many jokes, not the time or place.
“What exactly is that? He asked.
Angelica grabbed Marty by the shoulders. She was close enough, he could see her now.
Hey, blue sweater… Nice!!!
As he slowly brought his gaze up, he noticed that he was starting to feel weak inside. As their eyes met, he saw something terrible in hers. As if the life that was draining from his body and into hers was a prize, collected delightfully and with no remorse. He started to slump and her face began to glow.
Marty knew the end would arrive soon. Before it did, he uttered feebly, “I’ve had enough.” Then, he raised his head once more and stared hard into her fiery eyes. “But, I haven’t given up!”
Marty grasped her arms with his hands and there was an explosion of light. Angelica screamed, but held firm. Energy surged back and forth between them as they fought each other to harness it.
“It’s beautiful!” Marty said. Light exploded from their eyes and then darkness took them both.
8
He awoke to a poorly lit room, disoriented. He tried to open his eyes, but it was too bright. He had been sleeping for a while, he surmised. He felt like he’d been hit by a truck, or was very hungover.
“Marty?” He heard Veronica’s voice say and it was very comforting. “Are you alright?”
“Veronica,” Marty replied in a strained voice. “What happened?”
“You don’t remember?” He heard Nate ask.
Marty struggled to sit up a bit, pry open his eyes and take in his surroundings.
“No,” he said honestly, seeing that he was in a hospital bed with his friends at his side.
“We thought we’d lost you,” Veronica said. “That was a close call.”
“What was a close call?” Marty asked, his voice and vision both clearing up a little.
“You got zapped, Man,” Nate said. “Electrocuted.”
“What the fuck?” Marty asked, bewildered. “How’d I manage to do that?”
“I guess it was a freakish accident,” Veronica offered. “But, I blame you know who.”
Just then, Marty had a flood of memories and realizations all at once.
“I was helping her move some stuff in the garage, right?” Marty asked hopefully.
“Yes,” Nate confirmed. “There was something wrong with the wiring, who knows.” Marty raised his hands in front of his face. They were burned, but would recover. “No worries,” Nate assured. “You’ll be back making music in no time.”
“Why were you even helping her?” Veronica asked, annoyed. “She’s awful to you.”
“You have no idea,” Marty said. “Is she here?”
“No,” Nate answered. “Surprise, So and So hasn’t come to see you.”
“Can I borrow a phone?” Marty asked.
Nate started digging into his pocket, but Veronica produced hers first. Marty dialed a number as they looked on curiously. It rang a few times, then went to voice mail. He hung up and handed it back.
“What were you going to say to her?” Veronica asked intently.
Marty thought hard for a moment, then managed a smile before he answered.
“That I went into the light,” he said. “And, I looked for her, but she wasn’t there.”